Well we are back with Patty and Ginger and Janet is here to show us the Goofus and Gallant of teenagerdom, circa 1959. If she is this concerned in '59, I can't wait to see what she makes of 1968! I have some friends who read a couple Lamberts and then stopped and I have to wonder if the magic of her early books will be all worn off when we get to her later work. Regardless of her propensity for propaganda, she sure can spin a yarn.
Well we jump right in with Patty being awful about Mary Lou. Mary Lou is fat and will look horrible in a wool skirt and middy blouse (I think anyone would) and her attitude has nothing to do with the fact that ML beat her out for vice president of the class.
Patty is jonesing for a letter from Tim, who she met in WE'RE GOING STEADY but who has, lucky for him, gotten away from her. She is also awful about Ginger, who is her rock, and always picks her last to come over after she has tried the popular girls.
Patty's big brother Douglas makes the mistake of saying that Ginger has personality and Patty takes it as a personal affront. When Ginger comes over she makes a big deal about it and they decide to list their positive attributes. Patty has a million things she thinks she is good at, but Ginger is stumped. Nice girls don't love themselves, I guess. The decide they're both fine and give each other nicknames - Ginger is Personality and Patty is Plus. Weirdos.
So the gist of the story is that Tim is coming back. Patty has been pining and he has promptly forgotten about her, although he remembers Ginger was fun. In other news, Ginger is pining for Spark Plug, the Kenny Jenkins of her life. (Kenny Jenkins was the adorable motor head who lived next door when I was in middle school and high school and was 2 years older than me - fantasy fodder for sure...) And there is a mean teacher named Mr. Stillman who is a complete pill.
Well, it turns out that Mr. Stillman's wife is quite ill and he has small children so Ginger takes it upon herself to bring him food every night. Spark Plug helps her. They are so nice! Meanwhile, Patty is trying to get Tim back without looking like she is trying and also while maintaining her hold on popularity. He is resisting, somewhat to please his parents, somewhat because Patty is below the line of the Vicki Mendoza Diagonal. Patty is blaming Ginger for this because she can't possibly see any flaws in her own behavior.
They make up after Patty's usually ineffectual parents make her stay home from a party. She apologizes in the most condescending way in front of Ginger's mom and Mrs. Johnson CLEARLY hates her guts, but is too polite to say.
Ginger gets a dog, her parents hope it will help her be more independent of Patty. Of course Patty resents the dog. His name is Shadow and he sounds kind of boring, but I prefer him to Patty. Patty decides to punish Tim for "fluffing her off". Ginger points out that Spark Plug fluffs her off all the time and she doesn't care. That's the way boys are. (Did you know Quincy Jones produced that song?? I did not...) Patty says (and I quote) "And why should you care" Spark Plug's a square. He doesn't do big things. He's not an athlete." Harsh, Pat.
So Patty gets a date with Bill for the football game. And there is a delightful part where she is chatting with him and is both deep and self deprecating and I can see how, combined with her prettiness, that would be an intoxicating cocktail for a boy. She is thrilled to be dating a much older athlete. And Spark Plug tells Ginger she has a permanent seat in Beauty, the car he has been obsessively fixing up forever.
So both girls end the book on a happy note. And I am sure they will stay that way. Just kidding. I assure you that having nearly completed SPRING FEVER, Patty becomes even more of a toxic Tammy. But for now we will leave them happy. In the meantime, I will be back soon with THE STARS HANG HIGH where Bobby Parrish takes advantage of an elderly man's ill health to try to trick Susan into marriage. I am sure it will go swimmingly.
